When you're writing paranormal romance, you don't want a hint of anything being flaccid. Especially writing.
I did start that re-write, hoping to rejuvenate the spark. Not that I've gotten far, I'm still in the first chapter, but I like what I'm doing.
Let's compare my flaccid previous first sentence to my more stirring new first sentence.
Laurel's muscles coiled like a mouse caught between a trap and a cat.
Putting the obvious and stale cliche aside, this sentence is not only limp, but limps across the page like a peg-legged pirate. Did it grab your attention? Did it make you feel anything? Yeah, I didn't think so.
Oh shit! Oh shit! I'm going to die!
This sentence grabs more attention, is a little more alert, is more, shall I say, erect.
And just like that, we go from this land-locked fishy flopper ...
Laurel’s muscles coiled like a mouse caught between a trap and a cat. Even though she was at work and it was the middle of the afternoon, she was alone in the prop house, the humid air adding to her nervous sweat. Life had taught her nowhere and no one was safe … even daylight hours held shadows and danger.
... to this action-packed launch into the book:
Oh shit! Oh shit! I’m going to die!
The thought pummeled Laurel’s brain as she pumped her aching legs. Her toes throbbed from stumbling over rocks and sticks. Sharp breaths snapped upward from her burning lungs and exploded through her lips. Cramps pinched her abdomen. Tears swept from the corners of her eyes as yet another branch whipped her face.
Of course, I'm still in the first draft stage. This paragraph will be re-written a number of times before the end, but I already feel more excited writing it!